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Hey, Hi, Hello, Yo, Wassup, My oh me, Oh boy, What's word? Could I call ya?

Hi all,

I wanted to talk about something that is affecting me right now. That is continual persistence of a person messaging me who desperately wants to meet.

But first a little backstory. I met this guy on Grindr and we started to talk. He is older but looks good for his age. He said he liked younger, darker, hairier boys and so I was definitely what he was looking for. We chatted for a bit before we exchanged numbers. This is something I kind of regret. You know you get that feeling when you find someone you have an attraction to and you want to see how things progress. Well this feeling failed me this time in ways I have not experienced before. To say this guy is persistent is an understatement. He quickly started to message me that he was super excited that we will be meeting up and wanted to desperately see me. I played it cool, thinking this is a little full on for someone you have barely spent a few hours talking to. Red flags started to appear but I took it down as hormones and thought it would pass.

The next day I wake up to messages from him saying that we need to meet up. Fortunately I was busy that day so couldn't do that. He spent the day sending me messages and I replied to only a few. I'm a busy person, I can't spend all day on WhatsApp.

This continues for a few days. He would message me and say we need to meet up. I was short with answers because of two reasons:
  1. I don't like being harassed 24/7
  2. I find the level of desperation a bit of a turn off
After a while I think he realised how strong he was coming on and messaged to say that he isn't desperate (doesn't sound like it given the quantity of messages) and he just wants to meet to see what happens. At this point my mind starts to wonder. He is an older guy, single and just come out of a relationship (or so he says). Now this isn't uncommon, but the level of desperation says something else. Is he really just out of a relationship? Or has he been single for some time? If he is just out of a relationship was it because he smothered the other person with too much attention? These questions lead on to further questions. The picture doesn't fit right with me.

Today he messages (after a few days of silence - to me that's reprieve). He asks plain and simple if we are likely to meet. Now in my head I am saying 'NO!' but I decide to be nice and send a message to the effect that I am really busy of late (which is completely true) and that it does not look like we will meet, but I wished him luck in finding someone better suited. He replies that it is just to say hello (obviously subtlety is going to work with him). I conclude the message by saying I am too busy at the moment and that I don't want to meet. He wished me luck and that was that.

Or is it? Hopefully he has gotten the hint that I am not up for meeting. If he messages again I will say this outright. No more Mr. Nice Guy. I don't have time to waste on things I don't want.

Moral of the story: Don't let your initial horniness make decisions for you!

Until next time,

A
x

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