Skip to main content

So come on let it go, just let it be

Hi all,

So as some of you may know from my previous posts I am not fully out. I have told a select few people. But to others I just don't bring up the subject of my sexuality or discuss it to any great length. It's not that I am ashamed, it's just that I am a private person and have never really discussed my personal life (unless I need to vent - and even then I am selective about the information I give out). To say I have been burned in the past would be correct. I gave secretive information to a certain someone and they leaked it to everyone I knew at the time. So that has made me cautious. That isn't to say I don't know who I can trust. But there is one person in particular who I know I cannot trust. Lets call her GG (Gossip Girl).

GG is the type of person who wants to know everyones business, but will never share anything personal about her. The information you get is very superficial and typically about her many 'friends' (she instantly thinks that if you have said hello to her that you are friends). Whilst she is good at heart (at least I am led to believe) she hungers for gossip and can't want to tell everyone. This has been tested from time to time where we share ridiculous stories with her and wait to see how long it takes for everyone to know about it (the record btw is 4 hours!). Anyway, GG has this obsession with finding out if I am gay or not. So much so that she constantly asks my best friends about me, especially when they are out drunk, hoping that they will slip up and tell her the juicy details she so craves. Now i am lucky, the people I have told know how to conduct themselves in this situation. They are rocks, vaults even for secrets. So they would never tell. but for a period of time it seemed every other day I would hear of another attempt from her to find out. Every time I feel a little more annoyed. If I wanted to tell her I would. But I know telling her would mean 100 people finding out within a day. People I haven't even met would know about me. Thats not something I want, or am ready for at this point in my life.

I take amusement from the fact she is so inquisitive. Its like she has nothing else going on in her life but to obsess about me, and various other non-important matters. Thankfully recently she has cooled off, but there will be minor instances when she tries to fish for information again. She will always come away with nothing. To stop most of the inquiries I tend to stay away. She isn't someone I will miss if she left my life. She may consider us friends, but I consider her someone I know through friends. I will be friendly (I always am), but don't twist this in your head for real friendship.

At least I know that if I ever did want the world to know I only ever have to tell one person. Its like sending a text to all my contacts without the effort of doing so. But for now I will leave her speculating and enjoy the fact she will never know.

A
x

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Welcome to my house

Hi All, I got the best news this week! I’m going to be a home (flat) owner!!!! For those that know me and my story you will know that this is a big deal. It means I can finally move out of my parents place and start living life the way I want to, and in pride month no less. What better opportunity could I ask for? It means that I can live with the love of my life, and do all the cute and fun couple-y things that we were always meant to do.  It means I can just be me. That’s the main point really. No more hiding who I am, no more having to answer to others. Free to be who I want, go where I want, come back to the flat whoever I want. It’s not like I’m in a jail sentence at home, but the comments made on how late I come back home do take their toll. I’m the type of person who wants it to be easy, don’t cause too much of a fuss and that way no fights or arguments happen. I mean I am human and I will provoke sometimes, but for the most part I’m easy going and want things to be

Out

Hi all, Hope everyone is keeping safe from the pandemic and that the pressures are starting to ease off a little in terms of lockdown. It has definitely been a strange year, and it will continue to be for a little while longer. I honestly feel we should write off 2020 and forget it ever happened. Despite all the tragedies and despair there have been nice things to come from it. People are being friendlier towards each other and helping neighbours. They are innovating in times of need and helping out in any way that they can. It will be tough to move forward, and the effects of the lockdown will last for a generation, but we will endure. My post is about a little gem that I found on Disney+ called Out. It's a short animation about a closeted gay man who is struggling to tell his parents about his boyfriend, and the reason he is moving because of it. This is a first for Disney, as they have never really showed an out and proud gay character in anything before. They have alluded

I could be your private island

 Hi all, It's been a while since I last wrote a post, and to be honest not much has gone on in my world. Except for a pandemic, starting a new job and celebrating one year in the flat. So yeah, not much but also a lot! This year has been crazy, and it doesn't look like it will get any less crazy anytime soon. The pandemic is still rife, and affecting everyone and everything. I truly hope you are all keeping well and trying to maintain social distance with face coverings and hand gels galore. It has affected all walks of life, has made us adapt to a 'new normal' and has forced us to re-think our daily lives in general. One aspect that has affected everyone is travel. Be it local travel on public services, or the all elusive holiday abroad, we have all been affected. Bae has not been able to see his parents since the beginning, and every little sliver of a chance he gets to go back, the rules inevitably change and it becomes harder. I for one am tired of not having a holi